September 30,1985

My cherished little baby,

Never could I have imagined such a penniless check would make your mother feel richer than Daddy Warbucks.

We have found a way!

And there's more: your mother knows now how to get better so she can permanently leave The Whalestoe. I have found the scissors to snip the black ribbons which bind me like a Chinese doll, blind me like the old Spanish doll I once guarded in the gables of a fantastic attic where we both awaited our execution.

Of course, the details I must keep to myself. For now. The New Director doesn't know of my discovery. He is keen but your mother is keener and what's more she's very patient.

I pass through my days the way I have always passed through my days only now I have grasped the reason for my incarceration and a way beyond it. If only I had understood this when your father was alive I might have spared his heart all that strife and burden. Time provides in such strange ways.

Appalling that I never suspected until now the basis for their power over me. Your father meant well when he delivered me into this Hell Hole but it was not what he assumed. It is full of vipers and poisonous toads. If I'm to escape, we must be very careful.

As for your concerns, do not worry too much. School always starts out roughly.

love, love, love, Mom

Dearest Johnny,

Terrible news!

Only this morning, the New Director called me into his office for a special consultation, a very rare event, especially before breakfast. For twenty minutes, he went over my medication with me, going over every tablet, every name, the purpose behind each chemical I'm mandated to ingest each and every day, then emphasizing before the close of every minute, how it was not up to me to decide what I would and would not take.

But it didn't stop there. Believe me when I say I am not prevaricating in order to strengthen my case. The New Director fixed his beady eyes on me and brought up the matter of these letters, suggesting I might be writing too much and burdening you! Burdening you! Imagine that!

I actually might not have been so bothered had he not then inquired why I felt compelled to require an attendant to handle my mail.

We are found out! I told you the attendants here are foul people. Not one of them can be trusted.

Unfortunately that means your mother needs to find another mode of communication, which is a truly Sisyphian task. In my next effort, I will explain more conclusively how and why they keep me here, but those secrets cannot be shared until I know that what I write will only be viewed by you.

My darling J, I remain your only Mary.

Love,

Dear, dear, dear Johnny,

Where have you gone? No word from you is a heaviness all too able to break me.

Attendants and doctors all swear nothing has arrived from you. The New Director says the same.

I fear now they are keeping your letters from me. They plan to pry loose my knowledge by torturing me, something they can easily accomplish just by depriving me of my only son.

I must be strong. Write.

Distraught and wrecked, Mom October 12,1985

Dear and cherished Johnny,

See how incensed your mother is? I confronted the New Director yesterday and demanded he hand over your letters. Once again he insisted you had not written anything. I would hear none of it and caused quite a scene.

A mother separated from her cub can be quite an angry thing. Still, even though they put me in detention, they did not hand over your words.

It looks like you will have to come here.

Never forget my love for you exceeds my combined anguish and woe,